Having caught up reading the Sigma Game blog, I found this post to be quite interesting from the perspective of the definition of respect. And probably because this other post brought home to me why Vox always said he didn’t care about the why of the SSH.
This last one made me aware that having had years more practice at responding to the masses as a result of his blog, he is better skilled at communicating with people some 30 points or more lower on the IQ scale. The very idea that someone would assume that because they can’t imagine or understand something it doesn’t exist or doesn’t have a motive, or origin, literally never crossed my mind. Surely, I dimly thought wordlessly to myself in the depths of my mind, the point of asking why is to understand that which you do not… yet.
But once again, I forgot Professor Cipolla and his 5 rules of Human stupidity. Therefore, on reading about respect as Vox wrote on it, I asked myself how would I define the concept? Because I didn’t (and don’t) immediately agree with the descriptors Vox gave. And even more interestingly, how would I define the concept in a way that it makes sense and is mostly understandable to other people outside of my own head?
Personally, I have no need to define the concept in words, its limits and dimensions are crystal clear to me, however, as someone else said somewhere, the unverbalized thought is as the unrealised idea. Or words to that effect. And putting things into words certainly helps my ability to converse meaningfully with others. So let me try.
First I think it useful to define and separate two terms that can and often do become conflated, and which I think perhaps, Vox also conflated to some extent (maybe not, it’s hard to say without sitting across from him with some decent wine to hand); this is love and respect. While both can be present, they are totally separate terms. I can respect even people I hate, and I can love even people for whom my respect is negligible.
Fundamentally, I think for me respect is related to consistency and integrity even in the face of adversity. The Priest who would rather be executed than break the sacrament of confession. The man who right or wrong as he may be will suffer whatever consequences for his belief, the people or ideas he loves, is deserving of respect. It is why it is perfectly possible for me to respect an actual criminal more than a guy who has maybe never broken a single law, but who simply will go along with whatever rule comes along not because he agrees with them, but because he doesn’t believe anything strongly enough to resist.
In that respect, a person who takes the Vaxx despite having been warned about it, their contents, and so on, certainly will never have the same level of respect I have for someone who despite great difficulty refused to take it.
It does not mean I love them any less, but love does not require respect to exist. Friends and even family took the vacs. I still love them just as much. Maybe even a little bit more because now I am better aware of just how fragile and weak they were, but I can’t respect them as much as if they had not taken it.
The key passage for me were these four:
Respect should not be granted solely on the basis of approval, agreement, or perfection.
I agree wholly with this.
I was disappointed by the decisions of many of my friends and family members to get vaxxed. In a few cases, I was even surprised by them. But in no way did it lessen in any way my respect for them as individuals, or my regard for them as human beings.
It makes me wonder how Vox defines respect, because I don’t agree with this statement. I certainly don’t love any of the people less because of it. In fact, as I said, in a way I feel more sorry for them, which could be considered as a kind of love. A certain level of concern for their lives, and frankly, more so their spirits, which I think are weaker than I had thought.
But respect? No, it certainly has lowered from where it used to be. Conversely, people who I thought (and may well still think) are kind of assholes, but who resisted the vaxx, I have definitely more respect for.
Despite her disappointment, the wife should be able to at least respect the husband for ultimately being willing to listen to her and even to accept her advice in regards to his own actions.
Fair enough, this is a valid point, and I agree with it. She should take comfort in the fact that although he was wrong he listened and adjusted or at least let her direct him correctly. There is nothing wrong with this and in fact it is a good trait for a man to have, since we are all flawed, we will make mistakes and the ability to hear your wife out and adjust accordingly when required is certainly a quality deserving of respect.
I find that it is easier to develop respect for people who listen to me and then change their minds than for those who simply continue stubbornly on a path leading to a bad outcome.
I would say this is obvious for most human beings, although that is mostly because we all like to be “right”. Though I am pretty sure Vox here means it rather differently, and in a way I agree with again. I respect a person able to review the data and change their mind based on the facts, rather than someone who will blindly continue on because of their emotions and inability to cogitate like a thinking creature capable of reason.
Certainly respect might not be so easy to define clearly in words, which is perhaps why it covers two full folio sized pages in my Volume VIII of the Oxford English Dictionary. Nevertheless, I would sum up my own definition as the admiration one may have for a person that is willing to undergo personal sacrifice or duress in order to maintain congruency with their world-view and the attending consequences and duties that should follow from holding that world-view.
Of the 23 different definitions of the word respect found in the OED, most of them refer to a relationship with. A contrast. A relation to. Which is only part of the equation. Only four of the first 17 definitions approach something closer to the meaning I would give it:
13: Regard, Consideration.
14: A consideration; a fact or motive which assists in, or leads to, the formation of a decision; an end or aim.
16: Deferential regard or esteem felt towards a person or thing.
17: Deferential or courteous attentions; actions expressive of respect for a person; politeness, courtesies.
In the second appearance of the word, there are 6 more definitions and only one fits to some degree:
4: To treat or regard with deference, esteem, or honour; to feel or show respect for.
There is one more that also ties in somewhat to my definition:
15: Dread; fear.
Overall then, I would say that respect is something that gives one consideration, regard, appreciation (which can even be in the form of caution, or fear) for a person or thing. And that sensation, consideration and so on can also result in actions that can be interpreted as being respectful. But the origin of that sensation, of that noticing, of that appreciation necessarily comes from some attribute (real, imagined or faked as it might be) that the person or thing has (or that we ascribe to it).
For me, congruency, things like keeping your word, behaving honestly and honourably, and so on, are all aspects that can and do merit respect, but perhaps the largest part, personally, is probably the willingness to stand against difficulty, society, bad odds, whatever, in order to do, or act, or defend, or protect what is true and just and good or innocent.
Those who took the Vaxx did none of those things. They bent.
Therefore, I don’t see how my consideration for them in that regard cannot possibly have been lowered. It has. And it should have. I don’t love them any less, but yes, I do respect them less. Inevitably.
Why such a post? Who cares how Vox defines it? Well, the man has an interesting brain, and there aren’t too many of those around, and one can always learn something going down occasional random rabbit holes, you never know what you might learn. And conversely, one never knows who might find this post useful too.
Courage is worthy of respect.
It is, but is not sufficient in and of itself to be a blanket excuse for anything. Which is the conflation that the absolute bullshit statement of “thank you for your service” is SUPPOSED to entrench in the minds of most Americans.